Introducing Me

Well well well…

I am back. Still around? Whichever. I have a blog up and running (okay tbh this is my third or fourth attempt at a blog. One is up but all of my friends and family know about it…) but I decided to start this one to remain a bit more anonymous. Everyone has secrets after all, and I have few that I would like to talk about. They’re still secrets however, so it makes for quite a conundrum.

A new blog seemed like a good idea. My boyfriend has remarked that I seemed to be holding back quite a lot in some of my other posts. He’s not wrong. He also happens to be one of my secrets for a variety of reasons… but we’ll get to those later.

These secrets and stories that I want to tell, are not only my own (technically) and I have a need desire to avoid conflict. Mostly until I am fully financially independent (plus who wants people to hate them? I sure don’t).

I feel like I am somehow limiting my creativity by not fully expressing myself. I can only talk about the (mostly) mundane and boring aspects about my life. I feel as if all the interesting and juicy bits are buried beneath the secrecy. Moreover, I just want a place where I can say what a want to say without worrying about what anyone thinks of me. I am slowly but surely trying to apply that to my daily life, but there are still a few challenges along the way.

I have a whole bunch of controversial opinions and ideas that don’t necessarily fit in with my family’s expectations and their perspective of me and who I am. It is a struggle to be the different one. The psychedelic sheep of the family. I would also like to discuss those particular thoughts and opinions of mine here.

I adore blogging and sometimes I feel as if you know your audience intimately, you begin to cater to what they want to hear (or rather to avoid what they don’t want to hear). I admit, this feels a bit like I’m in a spy movie. I’m clearly not new to keeping secrets, but this is a rather big one. A whole space for me to talk about whatever I wish to explore or crack open. It’s slightly intimidating. I can’t help but think of Harriet the Spy and I hope my web doesn’t become quite as tangled as hers.

I suppose the rebellious teenager inside of me is enjoying this cloak-and-dagger-danger (okay I’m exaggerating I know, but this is a big deal for me) a bit too much. I hope she knows what she’s doing with the reins this time. She has taken us down a few slippery slopes over the past few years and I am decidedly not looking forward to face-planting any time soon.

C’est la vie.

Well, fingers crossed (If anyone is reading this, cross your finger too… and your toes… thanks).

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Lots of Love

xoxo

Pseudonym Goes Here

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P.S. If anyone is doing something similar, I’d love to know how it’s going and why you decided to make an anonymous blog.

P.P.S. No seriously I’m a bit nervous and I’d love to know I’m not alone.. hehe..

 

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